All across Singapore, locals here have adopted a simple 3-step process to tackle the persistent haze this week: #1 Stopping whatever they’re doing, #2 Whipping out their phone, #3 Tweeting a complaint about it. Bonus points for effort: some take it one step further by attaching a picture of their VSCO Fade +12 surroundings. Truly the mark of a first-world nation.
While Singaporeans may be predictable, our national pastime (no, not eating… the other one) of complaining is expressed through a variety of ways – some more entertaining than others. We present to you: the best jokes on Twitter about the sigh-inducing haze. Just try not to breathe in too much of this unhealthy air while giggling.
THE HAZE RUNNER [ Coming soon in cinemas ] pic.twitter.com/ZlhNwANYtQ
— exam / inactive (@seludelu) September 15, 2015
Hmm… idea for Jack Neo and his team?
Welcome to Singapore, Lewis! Sorry for the haze. It’s not our fault! https://t.co/W1jxcQV1kt — ST Sports Desk (@STsportsdesk) September 15, 2015
ST Sports Desk welcomes F1 driver Lewis Hamilton to Singapore in their usual cheeky style.
We are closely monitoring the haze situation and have put in a number of measures over the race weekend http://t.co/SZTSRhRqSK
— SingaporeGP (@F1NightRace) September 15, 2015
N95 masks will be available to patrons at cost price! Not really a joke, just a PSA. Thanks, organisers of Singapore GP! More here.
how to get rid of haze one fAn at a time . cmon guys do it too pic.twitter.com/3tHmeMCbOT — 제레미 (@jpxlw) September 14, 2015
I hope the F1 drivers love their Singapore fans, hur hur.
Sg haze is like Vsco fade +12 — •• AMEEEEEERUL •• (@AforAmeerul) September 13, 2015
It’s insta-Instagram!
The haze is so bad I have to hang out at the smoking corner to get fresh air — Shaun Tupaz (@ShaunT913) September 15, 2015
Really jialat ah, this haze.
eh ya’ll gather your kendama friends then all together spin spin blow the haze away at least do something ah rather than just being annoying — ammargarfs (@Ammarrrrrrr) September 14, 2015
The online movement against kendama continues…
I wanted to make a joke about the haze but I don’t see the point. — nic (@nicshields) September 14, 2015
See what?
What if behind those haze , there is …… pic.twitter.com/uuhuA5UUYe — Imran (@MdImrann_) September 14, 2015
Okay this is just some next level shit. Is that the monster from “The Mist“?
Haze or no haze , I still can’t see my future — NUKMAN (@NUKM_N) September 14, 2015
That’s a little depressing.
What if the haze was just a really good marketing strategy to get @NEAsg more twitter followers? #Conspiracy — Dee Kosh (@TheDeeKosh) September 14, 2015
Dee Kosh was last seen being escorted by into a black MPV by eight men in suits and shades.
Wanted to jog but it was 7th month period. Now 7th month over, haze come. I’ll just stay fat for the mean time. pic.twitter.com/rN6WlpPaQx — Ang Yonghui (@cabbitowl) September 13, 2015
Why is Zoe Tay‘s crying face not a meme yet? WAKE UP, SINGAPORE!
The malay frog commented about the haze, It says ” ra bak, ra bak”
— Muhammad Aidil (@Addharable) September 13, 2015
Even the frogs can’t tahan.
Took a walk on the Pinnacle roof garden ytdy. The view was spectacular, despite the haze. – LHL pic.twitter.com/0OZoOy2VpN — Lee Hsien Loong (@leehsienloong) September 14, 2015
Black and white filter, contrast +100, #sghaze gone! Turns out PM Lee is a pretty good photog.
haze precaution for cats pic.twitter.com/u9AUNl26bX
— ? (@nabildelonge) September 14, 2015
And finally… I have no words for this absolute gem.
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Find out more about the “We Breathe What We Buy” campaign that environmental group @WWF have been talking about here. “Talking about” is a nice way to put it… they’ve really been auto-replying to all mentions of the haze on Twitter.